I appreciate this piece, great points. I believe as an introvert ruminating is part of the package. I try always to interrupt the process, meditation is one way to do that. But for me second guessing myself is part of being an introvert, and doubting whether others will agree comes with
the territory. Lack of confidence just lives there. Maybe ruminating would be a good thing for some of the extroverts out there :)
Great excerpt and it helpfully reinforced where I am currently after a looooooong bout of ruminating over a (seemingly) negative family issue. that turned out to be one of the best changes I could have gone through and brought me to a place of freedom from the grips of a dysfunctional family.
Thank you for sharing Maya's work. I had an unexpected job change last year that hit me quite hard but I'm also a "glass half full" person, excited for something new. Where my rumination is the loudest is executing on that "something new". In the interim, I've focused on simply reversing my burnout and getting my confidence back.
This is wonderful and I can relate to so much of what is written. As a highly sensitive individual, I have experienced my fair share of rumination as well as anxiety!
My daughter is currently a senior in high school and the process of looking for colleges has definitely triggered the rumination loop for me. Searching for ‘all the things that can go wrong’. The college search process has brought in lots of joy too, but worry and fear has been ever present as I navigate emotions of becoming an empty nester.
Please know I reside in Minneapolis with my husband, daughter and greyhound - need I say more. I am doing lots of self-care at the moment to bring in as much grounding and to stay rooted in my body as much as humanly possible. These are unprecedented times in my city and our country!!!
I personally find Epsom salt baths, meditation and walks outside in nature with my dog give me space to see my thoughts patterns more objectively - making the rumination spiral less severe and steep.
Sending each and every one of you care and wishing you ease and grace on your life journey.
A special thanks to you Susan for the thoughtful, intelligent and affirming content you continue to provide here within The Quiet Life.
Lynn, one of my adult daughters lives in Minneapolis, so I have some sense of what you're living through. I fervently hope that the situation will improve sooner rather than later. As Carol said, there are so many of us who care deeply. Please continue to take care of yourself in all ways that are helpful. I'm sending you light and wishes for peace.
As another HSP, I can relate to tendencies to ruminate. And my heart hurts for Minneapolis - indeed, all of Americans who care about peace and generosity and democracy - so please know there are many of us out here who care, and care deeply.
I have an honest question for the people here: What does rumination feel like? Maybe I expect too much, or perhaps I misunderstand the topic, but from what I understand rumination to be, I have never experienced it.
I agree wholeheartedly with @Rene. My rumination usually occurs after a social event or large meeting that I’ve led especially if about a tricky topic (and will probably set in after I post this comment!😬). I replay what I said, how I could have offended someone unintentionally, what everyone must now think of me, beat myself up for speaking up, etc. It can go on for days. I call this voice my inner critic. Through the advice of a counselor, I have actually named my inner critic and try taking on the opposite viewpoint of her when I realize I’m stuck in a rumination loop. This has helped me coach myself back into reality.
I love @David’s approach to journaling and often use that to better understand why I’m ruminating and why my perspective might not be true.
Finally, when I am able zoom out, I ask myself “what is the chance that anyone at that party is actually still thinking about anything I said?” The answer is usually zero chance which helps me to let go and silence the critic a bit. It’s been a process at which i am improving but still a struggle at times.
I can lay in bed for HOURS replaying a conversation over and over and over again…analyzing, chastising myself, and wishing it could have been different. An endless loop!
My ability to coach myself out of ruminations was part of the reason I became a coach. The start point was the key. “Now, David, let’s sit and write down what the issue is here.” Keep writing until the imagined outcome becomes clear. Then you can start imagining solutions.
I appreciate this piece, great points. I believe as an introvert ruminating is part of the package. I try always to interrupt the process, meditation is one way to do that. But for me second guessing myself is part of being an introvert, and doubting whether others will agree comes with
the territory. Lack of confidence just lives there. Maybe ruminating would be a good thing for some of the extroverts out there :)
Great excerpt and it helpfully reinforced where I am currently after a looooooong bout of ruminating over a (seemingly) negative family issue. that turned out to be one of the best changes I could have gone through and brought me to a place of freedom from the grips of a dysfunctional family.
Thank you for sharing Maya's work. I had an unexpected job change last year that hit me quite hard but I'm also a "glass half full" person, excited for something new. Where my rumination is the loudest is executing on that "something new". In the interim, I've focused on simply reversing my burnout and getting my confidence back.
This is wonderful and I can relate to so much of what is written. As a highly sensitive individual, I have experienced my fair share of rumination as well as anxiety!
My daughter is currently a senior in high school and the process of looking for colleges has definitely triggered the rumination loop for me. Searching for ‘all the things that can go wrong’. The college search process has brought in lots of joy too, but worry and fear has been ever present as I navigate emotions of becoming an empty nester.
Please know I reside in Minneapolis with my husband, daughter and greyhound - need I say more. I am doing lots of self-care at the moment to bring in as much grounding and to stay rooted in my body as much as humanly possible. These are unprecedented times in my city and our country!!!
I personally find Epsom salt baths, meditation and walks outside in nature with my dog give me space to see my thoughts patterns more objectively - making the rumination spiral less severe and steep.
Sending each and every one of you care and wishing you ease and grace on your life journey.
A special thanks to you Susan for the thoughtful, intelligent and affirming content you continue to provide here within The Quiet Life.
Lynn, one of my adult daughters lives in Minneapolis, so I have some sense of what you're living through. I fervently hope that the situation will improve sooner rather than later. As Carol said, there are so many of us who care deeply. Please continue to take care of yourself in all ways that are helpful. I'm sending you light and wishes for peace.
As another HSP, I can relate to tendencies to ruminate. And my heart hurts for Minneapolis - indeed, all of Americans who care about peace and generosity and democracy - so please know there are many of us out here who care, and care deeply.
I have an honest question for the people here: What does rumination feel like? Maybe I expect too much, or perhaps I misunderstand the topic, but from what I understand rumination to be, I have never experienced it.
I agree wholeheartedly with @Rene. My rumination usually occurs after a social event or large meeting that I’ve led especially if about a tricky topic (and will probably set in after I post this comment!😬). I replay what I said, how I could have offended someone unintentionally, what everyone must now think of me, beat myself up for speaking up, etc. It can go on for days. I call this voice my inner critic. Through the advice of a counselor, I have actually named my inner critic and try taking on the opposite viewpoint of her when I realize I’m stuck in a rumination loop. This has helped me coach myself back into reality.
I love @David’s approach to journaling and often use that to better understand why I’m ruminating and why my perspective might not be true.
Finally, when I am able zoom out, I ask myself “what is the chance that anyone at that party is actually still thinking about anything I said?” The answer is usually zero chance which helps me to let go and silence the critic a bit. It’s been a process at which i am improving but still a struggle at times.
Ruminating is a behavior where lI am mentally torture myself by second-guessing all of my self beliefs. It feels defeating and agonizing.
I can lay in bed for HOURS replaying a conversation over and over and over again…analyzing, chastising myself, and wishing it could have been different. An endless loop!
My ability to coach myself out of ruminations was part of the reason I became a coach. The start point was the key. “Now, David, let’s sit and write down what the issue is here.” Keep writing until the imagined outcome becomes clear. Then you can start imagining solutions.