Is there really such a thing as a quiet leader?

8 leadership lessons for people who don't see themselves as "natural leaders"

“The Three Perfumes,” by Margaret Macdonald Mackintosh, who was thought to have influenced Klimt

Dear You,

*Do you wonder whether it’s possible to be a quiet person, and also a leader?

*Do you question whether you *want* to be a leader in the first place (despite the constant messaging that leadership is the pinnacle of human existence)?

That’s the subject of today’s Kindred Letter.

*

One of the unexpected twists of my career is that I find myself talking to a remarkable array of groups about the principles of quiet leadership: companies, schools, parent associations, universities, and, just last week, to an extremely thoughtful group of rookies on the Baltimore Ravens football team. This was an intimidating one for me because my vibe is about as far away from “football player” as you can get - despite my being married to and raising a family of fans and players.

But I spent an incredibly inspiring day with the Ravens. And it was astonishing how many of the players described themselves as quiet leaders. Many identified as introverts, *and* had also been captains of their college football teams. One leading player described how he prefers using fist bumps, rather than shouts, to bring teammates together in the huddle.

Onstage with Jameel McClain, Steve C., and my broken foot

All of this made me think of revisiting this topic with you, and sharing some of my favorite principles for quiet leaders (and for quiet people who prefer not to lead at all):

1. Lead, and live, from a place of conviction.

Whether or not you’re in a formal leadership role, one of the secrets to life is to figure out what you truly, deeply believe, and to operate from that place. This is part of what people mean when they talk about that over-used word, authenticity.

Here’s what this looks like in a leadership context: